[This performance-for-documentation served as research for my novel-in-progress, Hanging from the Hammer of the Bell and part of I’m With You 6: Scarborough]

Work was set to start at dawn, so I spent the night alone in the house. I liked it. It made me feel tough. Like the early morning, exposed to the elements and my fear of water. Like the broken typewriter that rendered the act of writing suddenly physical like it was when I was a kid. And it was a performance and a bit of fun. But it was also research for my book and my only chance to produce something for this book. So if it didn’t work, or if my work was no good, I might have to rethink everything, reconsider what I’d thought were some pretty good decisions, to be an artist, to be a writer, to produce pages every day. I wanted to wish for a good day, I wanted to pray for it. But I’ve been wary of magic lately and decided to leave it. Because the thing is, if you use magic words and they don’t work, the magic’s gone forever.

I made a flask of soup and a flask of hot water for maté, set up as close to the cliff’s edge as I could manage and started, with a typo…

Photos © Chritsa Holka